whoremoans maybe

“It’s like fucking a corpse. I am getting very frustrated.”

don’t know how to handle people. didn’t occur to me that there were people who act like homophobes to kinksters instead of to fags (even though I knew about them). didn’t occur that these people could be gay, or my friends. “I just don’t understand the way you are.” you know what? your extended family would say the same thing to you just because you like girls. get a grip, love. Goodbye.

no advice for the girl who I think is in love with a boy but they can’t talk about how they need to let go for the summer. don’t know what’s in his head, I am so sorry but I don’t and right now I can’t imagine, either.

no advice either for the other girl with the other boy but she doesn’t need it, and i am sorry that my secrets have a tendency to spill out from under my clothes and shock you and I know you love me but that’s little comfort when I also know you are scared and uncomfortable with me and really, darling, how could we have expected anything else?

don’t want to hear about your sex life but I am the best friend I can be and I listen and listen and moan, quietly, in my corner of the world. out of hating and wanting and jealousy and bitterness and illogic. wish I knew how to help you, when you have questions, because darling, you are wonderful, always so right when you answer mine.

I am so sorry that I scare you, that I am child enough to want the opinions of my older and wiser friends yet woman enough to make choices they disapprove of. I’m sorry I fuck with your instincts and cause conflict and say and do and feel things you can’t handle.

babe, you are the only one right now who seems to be accepting me at face value. this scares me because you are going away and you are my best friend and I don’t want this to be broken by all the current variables. and if he takes our bodies out of the equation of our friendship what happens? what happens when I decide I don’t care anymore and bite your lips because they look so soft? what happens when you disappear, or when i do? I’m so scared and I don’t have anyone at all to go to because you understand but are also the issue and

the hormones i think/hope are kicking in and i am crying and aching and please

please

please!